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Never say these to a naked woman

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When you’re seeing your woman naked for the first time, the tendency is for curiosity to take the better part of you.

However, be informed that there are things you do not say to a naked woman, Here are a few of them…

• I just remembered that I am married.

• Who needs 72 virgins in the afterlife when I’ve got a hot potato like you?

• Wow. You have a good bra, really holds them up.

• So how rough do you want it, baby?

• Girl, you got a vitamin D deficiency? I have what you need… in my pants! Seriously, new bottle, never opened.

• No, I’m laughing at a thing I just remembered. No, I can’t tell you.

• You ever get a backache carrying those things around?

• Can you turn around? I’m trying to find a good angle for my mental spank bank.

• Is that a henna tattoo or a stretch mark?

• Why were you playing so hard to get?

• You have curves and cul-de-sacs.

• I’m fat too, don’t worry.

• Do you smell something funny?

• You remind me of my mother.

• Do you want to take a quick shower?

• I think it’s sexiest when you’re not quite all the way naked. It keeps the mystery alive.

• Your sister got the good ass.

• Oh. I thought you were going to look different.

• Are these fake? ‘Cause they feel fake.

• Just keep your arms up so they look perky.

• How many kids have you had?

• Have you lost weight? Because your tits look smaller.

• Have you gained weight? Because your tits look huge.

• You’re big in all the right places.

• Your nipples are different sizes. They’re sisters, not twins.

• I like the right boob better.

• Let me show you my puppets!

• How much?

• Well, no matter what, I’d still bang you.

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